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When A.J. got to his apartment, his memory was in full replay.
He opened his mental archives and pulled out a memory of the time he asked his dad why things were like they were. These were the very same questions that P.J.'s childhood friend had asked her.
Why are we here? Do we have a purpose in life other than living and dying, with nothing much to show for it in between?
He remembered his Dad looking at him with a startled expression.
“Son”, his Dad finally answered, “better to leave questions like that alone. Even if there were answers to those questions, we have gotten along just fine for generations without knowing. I guess our purpose is to enjoy life now and leave it at that.”
A.J. could tell that his Dad was uncomfortable with even thinking about this kind of thing. His answer made it clear that he didn't want to talk about it anymore. It was as if he was afraid to venture down that road.
A.J. suddenly paused the replay. “That’s it”, he said out loud.
Maybe his Dad had been just as fearful as he was about the monster.
Had he started down that road as well when he was growing up?
Had he been confronted by the monster and instead of continuing to fight and defeat this foe, he simply gave up and stopped pursuing his quest to reach the land of Transformatia?
A new sense of compassion and empathy for his Dad overtook him.
“What must it be like to live out your whole life without ever realizing your dream, your calling?”, he thought.
A.J. wondered if there was a person like Noble who had tried to come alongside but, due to pressure from others, his dad ignored and rejected the help.
Then he remembered Noble’s prophecy - that A.J. could never go back. Eventually, when he was ready, he would defeat the monster and enter into Transformatia.
Could the same be true for his dad? Maybe it wasn’t too late? Noble had not said anything about a time limit.
This gave A.J. hope.
He made a decision. As painful as it might be, he had to bring this up with his Dad.
After all, he thought, his Dad was still relatively young and it shouldn't be too late. Maybe they could conquer this monster called Fear together and encourage each other along the way.
A.J. kept himself busy with activities that required little thought as he pondered how to approach his Dad about this.
This worked for a while, but it wasn't long before a nagging question crept into his thoughts.
“What if his Dad rejected his plan? What would he do then?”
He loved his Dad, yet his desire to defeat the monster consumed him. No matter what, he would not quit.
For some reason, the thought of his parents trying to stop him brought back another memory.
This one was from an even earlier time when A.J. turned five years old. His Dad bought him a brand-new bicycle for his birthday.
Even though he had already become proficient riding a smaller “training” bike with the extra wheels to help him learn to keep his balance, he had always been afraid to take the wheels off.
All he could think about was falling over and smashing his face or hearing ridicule from friends who had already learned to ride without training wheels.
So, when his Dad made him close his eyes and led him out to the tool shed in the backyard to surprise him with the shiny new bike, he was overcome with fear. He ran back into the house to his room and shut the door.
A.J. sobbed for what seemed like hours before he heard a soft knock on the door.
When his Dad came in, he sat on the bed beside A.J. and drew him into a hug. They sat like that for a long time before his Dad spoke.
“Son, remember how excited you were when we got you the training bike? You couldn't wait to try it out. You had no fear.”
A.J. nodded, almost imperceptibly. “But, that was different”, he replied. “With those extra wheels to hold me up, I knew I wouldn't fall over. I didn't have to think about it.”
“Exactly. You had faith that the wheels would keep you safe. Right?”
A.J. nodded.
“Well, I have never told you this but, I gradually adjusted those wheels so that soon you were riding using your own balance. The wheels never touched the ground until you came to a full stop.
“So, you see, you were trusting that the wheels were holding you up. You had complete confidence that they would not fail you and this allowed you to ride your bike with no fear.
“All the while, you were so focused in the moment of riding, that you never even knew the training wheels were not touching the ground. The only difference now is a new bike. Your riding skills and ability remain the same. ”
A.J. remembered the liberation he felt at his Dad's words. His fear was gone and a new sense of confidence poured into his heart.
He also remembered vividly the next statement his Dad made.
“A.J., those training wheels are a picture of the way of life. When we first start something, we need a lot of help along the way.
Soon enough our confidence builds and at some point without even realizing it, we are doing what we set out to do based on the skills and abilities we have developed.
“While those who helped us are still there for guidance and encouragement if and when we need it, we are free to go out on our own.
“It is as if there is an invisible hand sending help as we need it. Unfortunately, many never recognize or stubbornly reject the help sent their way.”
As A.J. thought back, he was stunned.
Somehow, this conversation with his Dad had escaped his memory until now. Granted he was just five years old then, but the detailed recollection brought even more questions to mind.
He thought about his experience with the monster. Was this not the same? Wasn’t Noble like those training wheels?
And what happened to the dad who said all those things?
What had changed between that time and when his dad had implored him to leave things the way they were and enjoy the life we have now?
He was determined to find out.
With trembling in his heart, he picked up his phone and dialed his dad before he chickened out.
Thank you for reading and supporting The Talking Pen, a site for fiction & non-fiction stories, poetry, art, and a memoir. While you’re here, check out my original ‘Stack: Life UnCorked, where we take a dive into the deep end of life from a Christian perspective.
Great job. Important topic.